Just a couple of days ago, I was indulging myself in nothing more but pessimism. This is a response to my performance in my previous examinations. I would consider this a natural reaction but the fact is – it’s not. And through those days, I have continuously attempted to cheer myself up but to a certain extent to no avail. The reactions weren’t normal. I have never experienced such obnoxious emotions. Fortunately, it proved to be quite an experience.
I have just read a journal on tabulas. To a certain extent I was amused by his questions to himself. Questions of his reason to live or something like that. Credits to the language used but I was more impressed with the questions a mere 16 year old can ask himself. I’d like to think of it as maturity but it’s not. I soon realize that no matter how many questions you ask yourself, some will always remained unanswered. I understood that he is a debater, coincidently, so am I. Debaters are naturally competitive people. Sometimes, the competition isn’t pleasurable at all. To a certain extent, I’d like to compete with this guy. He would make a good rival but I’m not sure a good friend.
I wish to be friends with all those whom I have debated with because I know that we would have one thing in common- sharing an opinion outspokenly without fear. In my quest for victories, I have met a few people whom I will always regard as friends. We share a common goal and I am glad I met them.
If they are reading this : thanks mate!
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My sister just told me that I am dying. My emotions are fading that I no longer react to anything she says. Yes, and so I have heard from many of my peers. I have heard from people that I know and from people that I don’t. Some of the most frequent used words are cold, cruel, emotionless and of course evil. You see, I don’t blame them for saying that. Then again, I never thought it was important for me to know what other people think of me. And even I DO have emotions, there would certainly be need to reveal or express it. The fact to the matter is, I do have emotions. I was extremely upset when Michael Schumacher did not finish his race at San Marino. I immediately walk away from the tv after I saw the tragic crash. It was disheartening every time Liverpool looses a game. I would have really loved to see Johnny Wilkinson played for England for Six Nations or Eight nations league ( I can’t remember what you call it). So, yes I do have emotions though you would reckon that such emotions are unnecessary. I have always had this sneaking suspicion that learning about Newton’s theories will not play a huge part in my future and I absolutely hated every time I couldn’t get the answers right for my Physics papers.
I believe that people have no right to judge who I am before they get to know me. I do not attempt to judge anyone I have met unless of course, I’m given the right to. Too many people tried to figure out who I am personally and put the pieces together only to find themselves in a bigger confusion. I have encountered one person who thought he know me very well Credit given to him for his unsuccessful attempt. It was gradually more irritating as he tries harder. I seriously do not appreciate his efforts. Over the years, I have found no reason at all to open the door to my world. It would a little too risky, wouldn’t it?
The European Grand Prix is tomorrow and I’d love to see another Ferrari one-two. I have always admired Michael Schumacher. I personally feel that there is so much of him that I can learn from- His endurance and his tolerance towards events and people. He was considered cold and unaffected as well. Cheers!
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