The weariness, the endless pain
Of waiting for some one to come
Who nevermore would come again."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Vittoria Colonna
Wait. Wait. Wait. Always waiting for something to happen.
You wait for your turn in line. You wait for your chance for promotion. You wait for the right time to make a move. You wait for you point in your life. You wait for something to start and then desperately for it to end. You give it all you have and you wait. Because, you simply cannot expect or learn to expect, you wait. Because from expectations, you wait only for disappointment. And, so you learn to wait. Waiting, after all, is the best thing to do. What else is there to do?
And, every once in a while, you get tired of waiting. Even while you deny yourself of expectations during the long hours of waiting, hope doesn't deny you. It fills you up. Either way, expectations or hope, they are self imposed. You can possibly live without expectations, not without hope. But, you get tired of hoping. You get tired of thinking tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow's not always better. Waiting another day doesn't make a difference. And so ...
You wait.
Time's a terrible thing to waste. You set yourself out to do something. Once that something is done, you wait for something to happen. We've got just this much time we could afford to spend waiting. Sometimes, we wait longer than we should. Some people live on borrowed time. That's what makes waiting so difficult. While waiting appears to be the right thing to do, you don't always have enough time to spend waiting. Time doesn't always allow you to wait long enough. It takes you away bit by bit while you wait.
Or worst - you don't know what you're waiting for.
Someone? Something? Sometimes, you just don't know. And, at most times you're unsure you really want to find out at all. Maybe, you could grow comfortable with waiting and you forget you're waiting at all. I forgot. Someone reminded me what a pain it is to wait.
Sometimes, you wait not because waiting is the best thing to do. It's the only thing to do.
[[ music ]] Muse - Unintended
[[ book ]] Shakespeare's Twelfth Night
[[ mood ]] tired